All the better to see you

Sometimes I like to pay careful heed to what is going on around me. Mum lifts the car keys and I am at the door faster than you can say "here boy". The dog next door lifts his leg outside and I have my aim ready next time I get out there.

My trusty nose and ears keep me up to date with all the latest developments and I am a schnauzer in the know. There is a drawer in our house and Mum keeps two things of interest in there. At least of interest to me. As it happens my favourite thing and my least favourite thing.

Care to guess what they are or will I tell you? Ok I'll make it easy. In there is my lead and when the drawer opens and it comes out I'm happy as a dog with two tails. However, sneakily enough, the drawer also hides the comb Mum uses to groom me.

I do not like this process at all. I am naturally fabulous and need no such enhancements in my own humble opinion. Not that Mum will listen. While I would like to be snoozing or playing with my toys, Mum wants to brush my fur. So I have to lie still. For ages. And for what? I feel precisely the same afterwards so it cannot have made any difference to me.

So I have to use all of my observation skills to determine what is coming out when Mum opens the drawer. Is it the lead and happy times ahead?  Or the comb and I should have moved faster to hide?

My schnauzer sense is getting good at this. If Mum has already produced the lead, then it's likely it's time for the comb. So I tell my paws, don't fail me now and get me to a place of safety sharpish.

So. drawer, your secrets are not so secret anymore.

I'm watching you.